Practise Gratitude

One of the consequences of having chronic pain I’m grateful for is gratitude – ironic, I know.

When you have chronic pain, it can be easy (and completely justified!) to feel incredibly frustrated/angry/upset/disappointed about not being able to do the things you used to. You feel down about how your life hasn’t turned out how you feel it was meant to.

When my friend tells me about a bike ride her husband did with her daughter, or when I see a runner, or an event that I was meant to be competing in, I feel it right in the bottom of my stomach. However, I’ve learnt to stop my thought spiral, focus on the positives and feel more grateful.

Slow down

One of the first pieces of advice for people who feel unhappy/dissatisfied/fed up with their life is to practise gratitude. But was I living at 90mph, going here and there: there wasn’t time to stop and be grateful!

As a perfectionist, my perspective was that nothing was quite right. I always needed to try harder and do things better. I do definitely feel that I was grateful for the life I had. But since practising gratitude, such simple things in life have become far more amazing.

It sounds such a cliché but when you slow down and to take the time to appreciate them, a beautiful sunrise, a shared moment of laughter with your child or the taste of a home-grown summer strawberry are so much better.

Change one word

This is a great piece of advice I read, which really changed my thoughts: “Think of things in your life as things that you get to do, not things that you have to do”.

And in just one word change your whole perspective on your daily life changes.

Instead of seeing the school run as a drag or work as a bind, consider the idea that you have the opportunity to do these things which many people don’t. It maybe won’t go as far as putting the bins out. But actually, you realise that there are a lot of things that many people in the world don’t even have that chance to do.

Gratitude for friends and family

I absolutely feel more gratitude towards my friends and family. It has been incredible how many people are genuinely concerned, ask about how I’m doing and are happy to listen to me (I think!).

I have friends who have driven to take me out for a meal. Friends who have helped with the boys. And friends who, even if I don’t see them, always make the effort to check in with a message. It’s a cliché, but when it’s dark you can definitely see who the stars are.

Gratitude trick

Here’s another interesting concept. It’s really hard to feel negative emotions such as anger or disappointment at the same time as feeling grateful. So a great trick is to turn those unhelpful thoughts into different thoughts where you feel gratitude and appreciation instead.

So how does this all link to chronic pain? Increasing your gratitude will lead to less stress, a better mindset and, you’ve guessed it, less pain in the long term. Again, like meditation, gratitude certainly takes practise but it is so worth it.